Something about it brought her memories back in a short heartbeat. She couldn’t forget. Yet she had no idea of the triggers within her mind. Something would periodically remind her of the time he made her feel so special.
Had she ever felt this special? She wasn’t sure. Probably, but it was in such a different way. Never like this. Never. Their feelings remained private to them. At least that’s the conclusion she drew. No lines were crossed, no words were spoken. Purely it was a feeling. To use the description of electricity didn’t feel right. It was more spiritual than electric. Something connected them she felt.
Without the spoken words between them, the giggle or even a miniature semi-flirt, all she could use was that feeling. Considering neither of them gave anything away to either, it would remain questionable.
After those weeks where she hadn’t seen him, she sensed her feelings had settled and she was stronger. She no longer pined after what might have been between them. So she thought….
Seeing him again just cemented what she suspected. He felt it too. His eyes were fixated on the back of her as she quickly turned back and caught his eyes looking at her. He held her gaze just long enough. She knew in that instant she was right. Her inner sense nodded with a ‘yep, that was definitely a thing’ and she could relax from here knowing that while there would be no ending to this love story, someone so amazing wanted her.
Telling her friend for the very first time, she began her text with , “If I’ve got this right, it will be the best thing I could have ever imagined.” Now she knew she was right. Yet living without him had its nice parts. Knowing it will never be spoilt. Never will there be arguments between them or the tangled morning hair. Everything could remain just perfect as it was.
Driving home from her exhausting day, with no prior warning, her mind decided to remember him. She was transported back to those feelings once again with such certainty. While the heating was adjusted in the car, her voice called out to her phone to instruct it to play the music she had saved on her phone to remind her of him. Of course it wouldn’t be love she was feeling. Something better perhaps.
Listening to the music transported her to a time and place which would go down in her history and definitely remain as a rocking chair moment. He would be forever perfect in her eyes. Just for tonight, she would allow herself the indulgence of wondering how he was getting on during this dark evening. Was he working? What was he wearing? Did he smell as wonderful as always? This rainy, cold night was so filled with a swollen heart for the love she never had but would be blessed with in her memory for eternity.